Rumors of My Demise Have Been Greatly Exaggerated
by fuzzy-ninja
Summary: Twenty short drabbles revolving around Optimus and Blackarachnia. Sentinel and others occasionally pop in to say hello. Did this for the music meme.  TFA


I wrote these back in 2008, first time posting them here on ff[dot]net. Did these for the music meme.

_Put your entire music collection on shuffle, hit play, and write. Write for as long as each song plays and move on to a different writing when the song switches (even if it's mid-sentence). Go for ten songs (or five). If nothing comes, it still counts. If you're listening to a comedian, you can skip it._

I don't own Transformers, and I don't own these songs. Well, sort of "own" them, anyway.

* * *

><p><strong>Fairytale Of New York -by- The Pouges<strong>  
>If there had been anything between the two of them, it was all in the past, now, as it seemed that Elita, no, Blackarachnia, was indeed a Decepticon, and wasn't going to change for the sake of rekindling an old friendship.<p>

**Dirthouse -by- Static-X**  
>"Let us help you."<br>Help? "I don't need your fraggin' help!"  
>I don't need anyone's help to become normal again. When I needed their help, they abandoned me. Who's to say that it won't happen again?<p>

I don't need your help, Optimus. I'm strong enough to do this on my own.

**Takin' Care Of Business -by- Bachman Turner Overdrive**  
>Fixing space bridges was <em>fun<em>. Sure, it wasn't the most glamourous, gloriest, or most fascinating job out there for a Prime to be assigned to do, but it really was fun, once you got past the drudgery, and learned more about your crew. Sure, it wasn't as exciting as working directly with the Elite Guard, but at least he wouldn't always have to cover up for Sentinel's blunders. No military formalities, no reports for every little thing, no nothing.

It was just a bunch of hard-working bots trying to earn a living any way they could. Optimus was much more proud of this crew than any of the other soldiers he'd had under his command.

**It's Beginning To Get To Me -by- Snow Patrol**  
>It seemed to be a fact of life that females were by nature, unable to make up their minds about what they wanted. <em>Must be something like universal coding of something.<em> Optimus mused to himself as Elita-1 sat in front of him, complaining. About Sentinel, of course. Sentinel this, Sentinel that. It seemed that he was all that she could talk about.

_Does she ever talk about me like this to Sentinel?_ He mused again.

**Slip Out The Back -by- Fort Minor**  
>"Ja, vell? A spy or a traitor?" Blitzwing's "cold" face asked.<br>"She_ was_ an Autobot," Starscream snickered, "What would seem more plausible?"  
>"I'm not a spy." She answered back, venom dripping off of every word. How dare they accuse her that she was leaking information to the Autobots!<br>"Well, you're certainly no hero to the Autobots." Starscream snickered again.  
>"Frag. Off." She snarled.<p>

**Numb Feedback -by- Linkin Park ft. Jay-z vs. Janet Jackson**  
>After the<em> incident<em>, Optimus often experienced odd sorts of "stasis-visions", things that would jolt him out of recharge and left him gasping for some sort of sign that _what just happened couldn't have happene_d but_ it did happen and it was all my fault._

**Every Breath You Take -by- The Police**  
>She was determined to make his life a living hell. <em>Think of it as a sort of thank-you gift for making me into a freak, Optimus.<em> Spying needed to be done, and a plan of much-needed vengence needed to make itself present. Weaknesses needed to be exploited, and strengths needed to be dumbed down and and destroyed. She was going to have fun with this.

**Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off -by- Panic! At The Disco**  
>None of them were quite sure how it happened, it felt extremely clich, and extremely dumb. Somehow, they had become <em>human<em>.

Clearly, this called for some -ugh- teamwork between the two factions.

Blackarachnia spent most of the day screaming at her teammates, berating the Autobots (especially to Bulkhead, as she left him on the verge of tears), and above all things, avoiding Optimus. She felt things for him. Physical things. Physical things that were not easily ignored in this completely organic body.

Come the next morning, Optmius emerged from his quarters, looking completely shocked. "What happened to you, bossbot?" A blonde teenager, Bumblebee, asked him.  
>"Blackarachnia happened," he said in a daze, "Blackarachnia happened all over."<p>

**Somewhere Only We Know -by- Keane**  
>Elita laughed. "Optimus, we're not sparklings, we're grown bots! Now isn't the time to be playing games!"<br>"Aw, c'mon Elita! Nothing's wrong with a little game of hide-and-seek!" He replied through a comm-link.  
>"A game of Mechhunt? Sounds like fun. Count me in!" Sentinel ran off from the yellow femme and into the dark woods of the plant planet.<br>"Guys!" Silence. "Oh, alright fine. When I find you walking glitches, you're toast!" She ran into the woods.

Optimus didn't hide so far, and therefore, was found first. He had really allowed himself to be found first, mostly by leaping from his hiding spot, and therefore scaring the nuts and bolts out of Elita. After being briefly berated by her, they had somehow become engaged in a mock-wrestling match

**Lost In Time -by- Stellastarr***  
>"Do you ever wonder?"<br>"Wonder what?" A sigh.  
>"Wonder <em>what<em>?"  
>"About... about her."<br>"Ah geez, Optimus. You gotta stop."  
>"Yeah, but-"<br>"No. You need to stop. I let go. You should've too."  
>"I guess."<br>Silence.  
>"You're still thinking about her, aren't you?"<br>"You're in the moon and your head is in the stars," Optimus said quietly, "He was young, did nothing wrong, I tried to say I miss you tonight, and they claim you've already died-"  
>"What the slag are you talking about?" "This was her favorite song," He made a motion to the radio, "You were her mate, don't you remember that?"<br>Sentinel glared, "Of course I remember!"

**Dead! -by- My Chemical Romance**  
>"Hello Sentinel." He blinked. "What in the name of sweet Primus are you? Yuck." He stuck his glossa out in disgust.<br>"You don't remember me?" said the black and purple femme as she circled him.  
>"Girl, believe me, I don't think I'd ever forget something as wierd looking as you."<br>"Maybe you'll remember if I give you a clue. My designation is..." Time to choose your words carefully, "Elita. Remember me now?"  
>Sentinel gasped. "Elita? Babe? H-hey honey!" <em>OH. MY. PRIMUS. WHAT WHAT WHAT.<em>  
>"I missed you." She said, seductively.<br>"Missed you too, love." He stammered out. "Where have you been all this time, dear?"  
>"Well... I uh... thought you were dead." It was, after all, the truth.<br>"Funny," she let a fake laugh, "that's just what I was thinking about you."

**Creeps Me Out -by- IMA Robot**  
>Sari decided one day, to play matchmaker between Optimus and Blackarachnia. "She could be a big help to us, you know!" Was a good reason, so Bumblebee and Bulkhead decided to go along with it. Sadly, Sari had no real experience in the dangerous field of love, as all her secret matchmaking plans somehow backfired.<p>

When she sent Blackarachnia flowers "from Optimus", Blackarachnia sent back a deadly space plant that nearly destroyed downtown Detroit.  
>When she sent Blackarachnia a bottle of high-grade "from Optimus", Blackarachnia sent back an envelope filled with rusting powder.<br>When she sent Blackarachnia a highly-detailed love letter "from Optimus", Blackarachnia sent back a bomb with a note affixed to it saying, "I love you too, sweetie."

Needless to say, Sari decided to quit playing matchmaker for awhile.

**Nomad Songs -from- Avatar: the Last Airbender**  
>"I can't believe this!" She yelled.<br>A noise like a sigh. "That's the hundreth time you've said that, Blackarachnia."  
>"And I'll keep saying it, Optimus! I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS!" Her yells echoed thorugh the tunnel.<br>Optimus couldn't believe it, either. Here he was, stuck in a cave on Dinobot Island with his ex-friend, and all they could do was glare at each other and hopefully figure a way out without getting each other killed. Whatever happened to that teamwork thing?

**The Space Between -by- The Dave Matthews Band**  
>That's it, Blackarachnia, just keep telling yourself that it's not true, none of it's true, just lies. Keep feeding him lies. Let him trust you. Like you once trusted him. Go for the kill as soon as you have the prey in your clutches. A spider is, after all, a predator.<p>

_We're strangers with warring hearts._

No, that's not what I wanted to hear, what I needed to hear, how could you do this to me? How could I let this happen to myself? Where did I go wrong?

_I'll be waiting for you._

No, no, NO!

_Our wicked lies is where we hope to keep safe from pain._

I really don't love you! Stop saying I do! I don't, I swear I don't!

_Take my hand, we're walking out of here._

Could it be that he's right, I'm wrong? I'm finally wrong?

**I Hate Love Songs -by- GWAR**  
>"You think you're really clever, don't you? A real bag of wit, huh?" Blackarachnia came at Blitzwing, ready to knock all three of his heads off his body.<br>"It vasn't me, I schwear!" laughed Blitzwing's "crazy" face, as he ran from her fury.

She hated flowers, high-grade, love letters, but most importantly, she absolutely hated love songs.  
>(Pity, because this time it was Optimus who really had sent the song to her!)<p>

**Anyone Else But You -by- The Moldy Peaches**  
>It was wildly unbelievable that Elita would even think about cheating on Sentinel, and with his best friend! Of course, what kind of friend was Optimus, if he allowed for it to happen? They both allowed it to happen, it wasn't so bad, in fact, they wanted more.<p>

Just remember the facts: you're a part time lover, but you've also got to be a full-time friend.

**Lovers Of Loving Love! -by- The Aquabats**  
>"BABY," The over-energized red and blue mech started, "This one's -URP- for YOUUU~"<br>Blackarachnia groaned. How did she end up here, at a karaoke bar, of all places? And with Optmius Prime, of all bots?

_A very drunk Optimus Prime._ She raised an optic ridge at this fact. _This could be fun._

**A Beautiful Lie -by- 30 Seconds To Mars**  
>Elita was nothing but a scant memory to herself and to her "friends". They would remember her as Elita, but she would continue life as Blackarachnia. A designation must imply function, no?<p>

_A beautiful lie._ She snorted in irony.

**Apologize -by- Onerepublic**  
>Optimus figured that it was never too late to apologize. Especially to Blackarachnia. It was the least he could do, even if she was on the opposite faction.<br>It was a real pity that when she agreed to meet with him on Dinobot Island, her Decepticon comrades stealthily tagged along.  
>It was an even bigger pity that when the Decepticons fired, both bots were completely caught off guard.<p>

Sometimes, it is too late to apologize.

**Under The Milky Way Tonight -by- The Church**  
>"Sentinel."<br>"Yeah, buddy?"  
>"Do you ever think that she's watching the same sky?"<br>"Dammit, Optmius, are you thinking about her again?"  
>Silence. Both bots were watching the night sky out of boredom, mostly because they were in the Cybertronian equivelent of being grounded. iThat's what you get for accidentally causing the death of your teammate.I Optimus thought gloomily.  
>"Optimus, I'm not sure how much more clearer I can put this, but SHE'S NOT WITH US ANYMORE."<p>

Countless cycles later, Optimus knows that Sentinel was wrong, but he still doesn't have the answer to his question. He knows that Elita, no, Blackarachnia is somewhere around the Detroit area; could she have been watching the same murky night sky too?


End file.
